HOW NOT TO WASTE TIME
A poem, by Heather Lilleston
Shhh. I can’t hear you.
I can’t hear you.
Can you tell me in a different language?
Our days are fuller and move faster than ever before. We have no time to waste.
If we are never wasting time while always wasting time, do we really understand time, and waste?
Does wasting mean we are so busy that we only have time to skim the surface of things? We don't have the time to breathe deep, look deep, feel deep.
They say that while we are busy skimming, our bodies accumulate toxins from our environments that begin to dictate and influence the thoughts in our mind.
Are we forgetting the ancient maps, the basic structures which held our lives together?
It’s kinda loud out there right now. Shhhh.
Without deep breathing, without attention on the inner experience and inner world, without taking our time with each other and with things, the toxins don’t get enough opportunity to move through our systems. If there is circulation,
the toxins leave the body, find a way in nature to return to harmony.
Many patterns in synchronicity. Like moving OUTside yourself.
Harmony means consistent circulation. This implies a dialogue. And the understanding that there is a purpose to everything in life.
A dialogue between the inner and the outer worlds.
We both speak.
A dialogue between poison and medicine.
Everyone agrees to listen.
A dialogue between confidence and insecurity.
Empathy lays the anchor down.
A dialogue between the past and the future.
The outer chatter begins to quiet.
A dialogue between you and me.
I didn't realize we had been talking so much that no one was listening.
It was painful to listen because it was too loud.
It was painful not to talk because the silence was unknown.
These are the distance memories of the distant distance between us and them.
Or was it that the silence that told us of the lack of distance? That we were never apart to begin with?
I can’t remember … I forget too …
Wasting time is forgetting that there is no time in the first place.
No time to ….
To sit with it and stare at it. To actually take in every little freckle and scar and beauty mark. To zoom in on one thing for a long time. Past the billboards that read BOREDOM. Past the point where your eyes start to close and your head nods and you wonder if you need to pull over and take a nap because going any further behind the wheel might be dangerous.
We may eat the best foods on the planet, but we don’t actually chew, savour, taste, devour, the foods we are eating. It doesn't get a chance to nourish our bones.
We need to remember how to nourish our bones.
We can order a new package of underwear and socks on Amazon.
Everything becomes disposable. We think we need more, way more, than we actually do. It doesn’t give us much time to really spend with the things we do have - without tossing them to the side for something else new.
We have forgotten the deep end.
We have forgotten the importance of what’s beneath the surface.
We have forgotten to move the side ribs horizontally.
We try to breathe deep. We forget. We forget that stillness is safe. That listening widens the minutes. Smooths the wrinkles.
Remember: wasting time is forgetting that there is no time in the first place.
Everything is growing.
Heather Lilleston has been teaching yoga for more than 15 years in New York, LA, and around the world at the retreats she leads in places like Costa Rica, Tanzania and Italy through her company, Yoga For Bad People. Her classes integrate creative vinyasa sequences with meditation, chanting, good music and spiritual philosophy, and YFBP specializes in retreats that combine quiet time and reflection with athleticism and nightlife.
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